From reputable lab guy to online private jet punker
It all started innocently enough. I retired from a national lab after 35 years of semiconductor and renewable energy research and was thinking about the next phase of life. I decided that climate activism is what’s needed most, so I joined Scientist Rebellion and found other like-minded scientist/activists who quickly informed me that to get anywhere in activism the goal is “social network, social network, social network.” Ugh. I basically hate social media. This invention has taken a wrecking ball to our societies, government… even our psychology. Why would I ever want to jump into that viper pit? But I heard repeatedly that that is the game, so I held my nose and started clicking.
I quickly learned that Facebook is passé, I have no idea WTF TikTok is all about, and TwitterX…? I avoid nausea whenever possible, thank you. LinkedIn seemed somewhat more benign: I had used it a bit in my career, so I began there. I started noodling around, updated my profile (retired old dude, former scientist, blah blah blah), then clicked back to my HOME page. There were some postings from old work colleagues, a couple from friends, but then, oddly enough, an advertising post popped up from a private jet company called “Wheels Up.”
Why in the heck would I get a “suggested for you” post from a company promoting one of the most polluting, elitist, and unnecessary modes of travel known? Did my computer surveil me soap-boxing with friends and relatives about this most disgusting form of transportation? In any case, there I was, conveniently presented with an opportunity to “comment on this post…”
My response sprung from the 15 year old punk that lives inside me:
Wheels up and carbon out – the butt end of this plane. Kind of a fitting metaphor, since private jets excrete 15 times the carbon per passenger mile compared to flying commercial. Be sure to take a flight to someplace not touched by climate change so that you don’t have to confront the consequences of your actions. Oh wait – there IS no place left where climate change hasn’t messed things up. Better yet – just stay on the ground and make whooshing noises. Let the staff bring you drinks. The planet will thank you.
Reluctant LinkedIn disrupter
I was kind of proud of this post. I hit RETURN and didn’t think anything more about it. But algorithms being what they are and social media being what it is, LinkedIn clearly decided that I must be very interested in private air travel and would like to see more. The very next day every fourth post on my feed was for a private jet company! Flexjet, JSX, Executive Jet Management, Mesa Air… they all clearly wanted to attract my private jet business and my deep-pocket retirement savings from decades of killing it in the science game. What luck! So many new opportunities for “punking!”
Fast-forward 6 months or so, and what started as a single, smart-assed, catharsis of sarcasm has become a frequent, enjoyable opportunity for creative writing. And if I thought I might run out of snark for private jets, it turns out that jet-setting customers must also be interested in high-performance cars and fuels since I’ve recently been offered ads from Shell and Exxon, two of my favorite companies to disparage.
Does punking ads on LinkedIn actually have any impact besides personal amusement? Hard to tell, but it seems my campaign of “persistent punking” has at least ruffled some feathers. My LinkedIn profile has been viewed by plenty of private airline employees, oil company employees, and oil company lawyers (!). I have even received a comment from the CEO of one of the jet companies, and had a respectful disagreement. At least they are taking notice, and hopefully, so are some of their passengers. Here are a few more examples:
Ad: Wherever you are going Wheels Up can get you there. Explore private jet options and pricing for your next summer getaway!
Punk: Available soon – fly our private jet to your own private planet since Earth will be quite unlivable due to people flying in private jets – which emit 15X more carbon per passenger mile than commercial jets. Tell Elon we said “Hi.”
Ad: This year, attend the first-ever 12-team college football playoffs with Flexjet. See how we recently celebrated one of college football’s most cherished and respected rivalries. Who is your favorite team?
Punk: That’s right – support our young kids by flying the most polluting form of transportation to their game, and at the same time, kill more of the life-sustaining places on Earth that those kids will inherit. The cognitive dissonance is skull-cracking.
Ad: Last night, JSX had the honor of attending the APEX (Airline Passenger Experience Association) annual awards ceremony, accepting the “Five Star Regional Airline” rating for the 7th year in a row and marking JSX as the only five-star rated regional air carrier in the world.
Punk: We also recently received top honors at the Frequent Flooders award ceremony for those companies most responsible for climate disasters. We have achieved this honor by an artful mix of frequent flying and using the most polluting form of transportation known. A “Best in Class” that will be hard to beat!
I highly encourage other SR types to try out this form of activist entertainment and social commentary. The companies are listed above. I like to include a statement about how private jets dump around 15X more carbon per passenger mile than commercial jets, avoid cheap personal attacks, and maybe tie in the consequences to the next generations, since that is a heart string that we all should be pulling.
Helpful Resources for Punking Private Jets
Climate-chaos-causing conspicuous consumption via excessive aviation got you ready to scream? We can help.
Here is a list of websites to track private jet flights, useful for punking and shaming profligate use during the upcoming Super Bowl weekend, or anytime.
Background on why private jets are so awful:
Companies offering private jet services:
Wheels Up
Executive Jet Management
Flexjet
Signature Aviation
JSX
Embraer Executive Jets
Shaming Celebs for Private Jet Excess
Here’s a list of the worst celebrity offenders from 2022. The “leaderboard” at Celebrity Private Jet Tracker might have more up-to-date usage information.
Scientist Rebellion Turtle Island is also planning a social media campaign shaming celebrities for flying private jets to the 2025 Super Bowl via social media. We’re creating a list of celebrities likely to be taking private jets to the Super Bowl, with their social media handles. Follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, BlueSky, or Facebook to like and amplify our messages!
Happy Punking!
Here’s our post going after private jet fliers attending the Superbowl – https://www.instagram.com/p/DF3XIwzpKhN/